FIXED!!! p5e3 deluxe / boot problems? maximus extreme owners disable express gate

[trans am]

Hi guys, I bought 2 of open box p5e3 dlx/wifi boards from newegg and just got it set up today. but having lots of issues...
I flashed to latest bios 3/28 to enable my x3350 and if i change any setting in bios the boad will post beep but I get a black screen. I have 3 sets of ram and 2 p5e3 dlx and both have the same problem.

system is:

usb keyboard
usb mouse
asus p5e3 dlx bios 1001 (reflashed to older one but no help)
x3350 xeon 45 nm quad and (tried e8400)
mushkin ddr3 2x2gb
sata dvd
corsair 750w
x3870 x2 all power plugged in
2x sata 7200.10
1x 500gb sata 7200.11
the rest is watercooling crap

the only way I can get bios or normal post is to reset cmos every time

please help. i was up till 6am trying to figure this out?