Since you have a quad core I would stick with either the 14 BIOS or goto the 16B04 version. The 16B09 seems to be really made for the wolfdale line and I doubt it offers you any real advantage with the Q6600.

Bolt mod isn't mandatory, some people reuse the plastic retention clips, they just don't offer the pressure that the small bolts can. However, you should NOT use a paste that is conductive on the PWM area. Best to play it safe and get some non-conductive thermal paste or even reuse the supplied black pad and make sure it contacts all of the PWM modules. Arctic silver ceramique is the paste of choice for the PWM area if you can get it, normal AS5 is fine for the north and south bridge.

8GB should be fine with the overclock you're looking to get, you will most likely have to bump the voltage up a bit for the MCH to get it stable. I would start checking stability though of the CPU by using only one 2GB stick, after you're sure the CPU is stable at your OCed speed, go ahead and add the others and test again. I'm using the OCZ vista upgrade (cheapie ram) 2GB modules and they run on my board fine at 450 FSB @ 5-5-4-12/2.1v so I bet you'll be fine.