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Last edited by CmB; 08-07-2009 at 11:52 AM.
SOGOs > BOGOs
man u made me cry
be strong, keep fighting and i wish you no pain.
and live your life... as long as you can
KME, you've done nothing wrong in posting this. I can't pretend to know how you feel. I can't tell you how to feel or what to do. What I can tell you is that you must fight as long as you need to. Do whatever needs to be done. Call all of the cancer specialists and see only good doctors.
I wish you the best.
You have a PM..
Crunch with us, the XS WCG team
The XS WCG team needs your support.
A good project with good goals.
Come join us,get that warm fuzzy feeling that you've done something good for mankind.
Originally Posted by Frisch
Man you been through a lot, but there is always hope. Hang in there.
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Crunch with us, the XS WCG team
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Whoa! Let me tell you this. It is better to share your stuff, to lighten your load. It is way too much too keep bottled inside. People want to love ya. This is what I'm finding out.
Your post was not inappropriate. I wish you love and friendship to fill the hours.
Scott
Crunching to Crush Cancer
Somebody, Stop Me!
Wow. I don't even know what to say man.
I know I'll keep you in my prayers, and if you need anything you got a huge family of support right here. Keep your head up!
And don't be afraid to ask - you'd be suprised how great some people can be.
+1.....and let me say as an ex army guy who has seen some...stuff....you did the right thing by Eamon. I hope that someone who knows you sees this and lets your friends, those you feel you may have wronged, see this. Such heartfelt comment should not go unheard.
Be strong, friend, and know that we are here for you.
My Biggest Fear Is When I die, My Wife Sells All My Stuff For What I Told Her I Paid For It.79 SB threads and 32 IB Threads across 4 rigs 111 threads Crunching!!
You are working through it as best you can KME, I hope you find the strength to continue with your work. I want for you to be well and am honored to have been allowed inside your soul. You deserve to win this battle and enjoy some peace and pleasure in life, you must and you will.
-Pete
EVGA Classified 760, i7 920 D0, 6GB GSKILL, TRUE Copper, XFX GTX 295 dual PCB
Be strong and find your inner peace, it's in there down deep.. you need to focus on your health now, don't worry about anyone else. they will worry more if you don't focus on staying strong, even if you dont want it that way; that's the way it works. I went through about a year of a death diagnosis before my liver/kidney transplant and even got removed from the transplant list near the end and sent home on hospice to die; but pulled out of it somehow and got back on the list a month later. the best advice I can give you is take it day by day now and try not to get trapped in your emotions, that's the worst thing you can do when you're real sick. take each day as a blessing and be thankful for each day you have, if you find yourself worrying about it and getting depressed, remind yourself that this is a new day and you are still here. God has given you this day to live, so live and be strong in your mind for your loved ones, show them how strong you really are, they need it as much as you do.
God has a plan for you each day, and sometimes it is not what you like. But be happy that today you are still here, so make the most of it even if that means just showing love to the ones in your life or not letting depression grab onto you today. any small victory is still a victory, baby steps will get you through it, one day and one hour at a time. And always remember God is always there with you no matter how much pain and suffering crowds in around you, look inside yourself and find the peace that God is offering you, and I guarantee you'll feel less burdened.
I wish you all the luck in the world and my prayers are with you.
I canīt provide much help but all I can say is to try to recover peace in your inner self ( above everything and take it as a top priority). You had been through a bunch of terrible situations. If money is not an issue invest in trying to help yourself in every aspect you can ( and when you feel youīve reached your limits ask a PRO for help).
Even though in a much smaller scale Iīve been in times when everything seemed to be sh.. and I had the feeling I would be like that in that way. Pieces of advice of people didnīt touch me as they were "those who have stuff solved and done right for some f. reason". Trust me ( and with my best intentions) that you have to take this as something ( I canīt tell either why or what caused this facts to take place) that if you are able to overwhelm you will end being a very happy dude. Even though I tried my best I couldnīt do it ( I really, really gave my best) and with a handful of docs Iīd been able to cope harsh situations! Even though you might not be able to see it now the healthiest thing is to get yourself healed (and get strong like a bullion) and everything will turn favourable in your way!
I hope my wording is of any use!
"Study hard my young friend"[/B].
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Woody: It's not a laser! It's a... [sighs in frustration]
no s.. that made me shiver
+1 million.. very well said dude
Dude you definitely have what it takes to go over it. We, you and everyone knows you did nothing but good! I can tell you you will be out of there in a very short time frame. Keep it kicking
I second it! A very very concise of the real thing we can provide you!
Last edited by Duh; 07-21-2009 at 06:40 PM. Reason: had to unificate as we dont have automerging and donīt want to be seen just as if I want to raise my post count :)
"Study hard my young friend"[/B].
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Woody: It's not a laser! It's a... [sighs in frustration]
KME; I am really sorry to hear all that you have gone through. Granted, I have not gone through anything quite this severe; I have been through a lot so far in life when it comes to tragedies. I can feel a lot of your pain, but cannot fully feel all your pain as I have not been in this exact situation, but my thoughts and parayers are with you.
WCG has some very emotional issues this week. I was just coming to check the stats and stuff to find a few horrible things going on as yours and Serlv's. I do not know if there are more, but this is making for a sad night tonight.
Hang in there and be strong. You did the right thing and I would have done the same myself with all your issues. miracles do happen and lets hope that you are next on that list! You are similar to me in ways; you are there helping others ,but get punished for some reason, but that isnt an excuse to give up, but an excuse to fight harder.
I am at a loss of words now, but I wish you the best along with all the others going through similar situations. we are here for you; I am sure there is always someone here that you can talk to if need be.
Keep us posted
FTW dude! without that you canīt do any good to any one ( starting by you). I had been a pompous punk before I could admit having problems ( and that was the same as being a looser). I chose probably the toughest route: stay away from alcohol ( I donīt even really enjoy it), study medicine which I found and find interesting and do so (light) weight training.No really, I haven't done nothing but good. I reallyed up that girl. I have to say this, so the truth comes out.
I loved this girl more than was really healthy. Sometimes I suppose you can get too close someone, like a moth to the flame. Well, I could see my problems were hurting but she said she loved because she found me handsome, smart, polite and a gentleman. It did my heart good to hear these things.
I took to a concert, Nickelback to be precise, because she had never been to a rock concert. I've been to more than I can count. I wanted this to be a special experience for us. It was awful.
I lost my mind. Some sort of mental breakdown. Nickelback's photograph brings back a particularly awful memory. I told her I wanted to leave her, I was so low and depressed I was sitting there crying like a baby during the warm up band. I didn't want her to see me. So I left the concert because I wanted to go home. I had been drinking, I know I shouldn't have but I struggle with alcohol. I like it too much. If you're going to die go with a smile and enjoy yourself. Wasn't right I know.
I asked her if she had a ride home, she didn't so I waited and went to pray for strength from the Lord, or whatever there is to get through another day. I couldn't find my bloody car. She and her sisters thought I had skipped out on them or was drunk. I would never drive her home drunk. Her safety is the most precious thing in the world for me.
I wasn't drunk or even tipsy, my weight and tolerance are enormous. But I flipped out on her and her sister. I said things I didn't mean. Awful, spiteful things. I told her that she should get a ride from her mother. Which hell, I thought I needed it too. I figured I had to report the damn thing stolen. I could not find it until a half-hour later by that time it was too late. The damage was done.
I've apologised and bought her presents. She hates me and won't speak to me. rightfully so. What I woud give to go back and redo that, I would never have done that. Hindsight is 20/20 indeed.
She thinks I'm a liar. That I'm not even sick. I can't stomach to take her with to the doctors, I just can't. I've not always been this low, a loser. I wish I was more. I want to be something to someone. Love is the most important thing to me.
I can see that if I ever want her back, to truly have a relationship with her. I have to heal emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually. You don't put people you love on an emotional roller coaster like I have.
I wish she knew how much I cared. I left her because I want her to be happy. I think I realise that even through everything I've put her, she loved me and cared for me. I have to let her go and heal, but that is difficult for me.
Again thank you. I had to get this out. If she sees watch she gets pissed at me for it.
You know how people who choose alcohol as a solution end. You are the one who chooses his own route and the consequences this might bring you.
Mental health before proceeding! Believe me you canīt do right decisions with the upper thing that is between your ears working as expected. Choose the most precious thing on earth as an objective ( without getting obsesive) and do it for that/her/him. Remember yourself your aims and do the things in such a way not to feel regret! You might be having a chemical disbalance in your brains due to some painful/tough situations you had to go through. IMHO: you must be humble enough to ask for help ( like you would if you got hurt in a car crash).
All my best dude!
"Study hard my young friend"[/B].
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Woody: It's not a laser! It's a... [sighs in frustration]
You are a winner to me ( maybe and most likely you donīt care what I might say as an opinion). I had that feeling with girls of not being to establish a conversation ( I was really crippled, maybe a hormone spike which gave me my 1.93 meters :P).
Do you know a guy who was named Richard Feynman is . If you have any spare time read about him ( you can get many smart thingies from that smart guy). One of them was a phrase ( his wife told it to him): what do you care what other people think?
I asked to myself: I bet I will die and canīt think of that way ( I was always aware of people īs way of observing me). I did many things to try to become stronger ( I am not even close to being fully in shape until know but I can say I feel happy and grateful) .One of my methods ( when I felt a tad extra of confidence I used the submersion systems: go and confront the traumatic situations with a pharmacological ( doc prescribed me those, everything as it should). After various times of exposition you get stronger .Same happens when you are down and you have the meds the doc gave you for some time. After some time you start to believe in yourself ( and you should quit meds until the docs say so). In some cases you should make a downgrading plan ( to start reducing the dosage and donīt feel the bouncing effect). There comes a day in which you donīt need to take all that sh.. and you feel very good and life has a completely different smell
The only limiting factor to be be a looser or not is you ( and you have proved to have the guts to take the tough route).
My best wishes!
"Study hard my young friend"[/B].
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Woody: It's not a laser! It's a... [sighs in frustration]
Certainly no need to apologize here, you are among those who understand, at least some of this. I've had a few of your items occur over my lifetime, which has been longer than yours so far... I'm 47, have made peace with my maker over several serious events in my life, so if it's my time to go, fine. I'm OK with that. Sometimes I wonder if living can actually be harder?? I can hear some of your post is about your age. It ain't supposed to be happening to you...Your young.... You're right, it's not, and that really sucks. I can't say anything to change it, and so all I can do is try to help put it in perspective. I sincerely hopes some of my "rambling book" helps....
I was a pall bearer at a good friend's funeral who decided to blow his brains out. I was 18, he was 19....Talk about a mind F**k for me when I saw his Mom lose it over his casket.... Suicide came out of my list of things I could do that day....
I've lost lots of people to cancer and other stuff. The first, and most tragic thing to me, was when I lost my Grandfather to a sudden heart attack when I was seven. He and I were just hooking together on the "what-is-life" thing. He was my guide, then he was gone. Wilhelm Peter was his name. He was golden.....
My Dad was nuts, abusive at times, so I had to find others to help guide me through the life possibilities. My Mom was my main stay, and still is now. She's over seventy, and when she goes, I know I will be nuts, until I latch onto some footing and continue on to fulfill my roll as parent to my daughter. The grace I show during my Mom's passing will help her go on when my time comes, and when it's her time to pass. Yes, we need to re-learn how to die in our society. In at least the USA, we are very insulated from this natural process....
I found several adopted Grandfathers over the years. I also lost them to cancer shortly after making the connection. These names are John Kupper, Phil Hels, and Dave Babbitt.
Dave was an unexpected mentor. He was my Manager for the last 15 years on my day job. I instantly made a connection to him when I moved out to the NW, from Chicago, with an already solid career with Motorola. Dave and I just hit it off, I don't know why, and he helped me through some very difficult times, including a divorce. (I have sole custody. Very unusual for a guy to get that.....)
I have loved, and lost. I have loved from afar and never had the balls to tell the lady. Ahh, yes Passion, I have had that too....in spades! I have loved with the Romeo and Juliet BURNING passion, and with the cool smooth way of a good jazz song. This comes and goes over your life. I've had also the divorce, gee, that wasn't in my life plan....You know, you just deal with it when it comes. What I have learned is never stop loving. This paragraph is about relationship love...
I bold highlighted your major statement, at least to me, above. It is about love. All types, brotherly, family, lover, soul-mate. You can never go wrong with this, whatever happens, live or die.
And in Closing, May all of us find Love, give Love, and be Loved. That's why we exist. It's really quite simple....The rest of the crap just doesn't matter.....
My best to you,
Bob
EDIT: And jeez, had i taken the time to read all the posts before I constructed mine....You guys rock. What they said above too.....
That must be hugely overwhelming...
Chris, in times like these, it's important to take stock of what you have and keep your chin up. Leave the things that make you sad and move on in life. Worry about how you will recover from your ailment for now. If you keep thinking about the things you've lost, you'll start to go on a very dangerous and useless road.
You have a PM m8.
Perkam
You've got another PM m8
And ty for the answers
EDIT: I thought everyone should know this. By far the best place to go to for anyone post-diagnosis is this:
American Cancer Society
You can find a branch in your community or near it and they should have questions to most of your answers.
Perkam
Last edited by perkam; 07-23-2009 at 08:47 AM.
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