Urban dictionary word of the day

[twilyth]

Some of the definitions they pick for the word of the day are pretty funny. So I'll use this thread to post the ones that seem funny. Y'all are welcome to do the same from UD or any other source.

today's word is:

Destinesia

When you get to where you were intending to go, you forget why you were going there in the first place. Not to be confused with being stoned, destinesia often occurs during working hours, and is the cause of much frustration.

John ran down the stairs to the dry storage and walk-in, but when he got there he couldn't remember what he needed. Consequently, he had to run back upstairs to the kitchen, and look at his prep list again. Damn you, destinesia!

[MikeB12]

John sounds like he's been in the skunk bud...

[twilyth]

John sounds like he's been in the skunk bud...

Hell, I forget between the time I decide to go do something and the time I stand up. The upside is that if I ever get Alzheimer's I won't notice. Speaking of which, there's a good article on how age related decline of a certain receptor leads to a build up of malformed proteins - as in Alzheimer's. article is here. I'm not posting it in it's own thread since it doesn't really relate to anything that could be used immediately and I'm trying to keep the number of science posts down. Although there is so much good stuff out there I want to share, that's going to be tough.

Today's word is:

driving finger

Your middle finger. Usually refers to the one on the left hand so it can be displayed out the driver's side window to comment on another driver's behavior.

Your driving finger is the longest finger.

[[XC] gomeler]

I love the urban dictionary, makes me so happy to read their definitions Reminds me of The Devils Dictionary

One of my favorite definitions

CAT, n. A soft, indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.

This is a dog,
This is a cat.
This is a frog,
This is a rat.
Run, dog, mew, cat.
Jump, frog, gnaw, rat.
—Elevenson

edit: hello new sig statement

[MikeB12]

My 84yo grandma's Alzheimer's got bad enough this year that we moved her out of her house and into a Alzheimer's care home in March. she's just now getting used to it, she has been a real bear from March-July... but seems to have simmered down in the past month. I'm not sure if it's the disease getting bad enough to where she doesn't remember enough to fight everyone, or if she's just getting to where she's made friends and got used to her new living arrangement... it's not a bad place, high rent, apartment assisted living where a nursing staff tracks medication, offers bathing and dressing services, and has a nice cafeteria where they have multiple choices at each meal and can eat in their room or in the main cafeteria... she's actually put on like 10lbs since march the food is pretty good, I've eaten with her a few times and they have food comparable to a luby's style cafeteria.. plus they have excercise classes everyday with water therapy in a pool... book clubs, church groups, craft classes, etc...

I think the only reason she fought it was because after she had a couple incidents where she almost burned the house down leaving the oven and stove on, the doctor tested her and said it's time to go to a home-advanced Alzheimer's.... and she thought that meant nursing home and said no.. so the family had to get a dr order to force the issue... but she's not poor and has a big pension from 2 husbands that both died while they were married... so it's not like she has to go to a min care lockdown nursing home.. she got the high class expensive apartment type facility with a luxury room and room service...

she's pretty advanced though, she can't remember what she says from one minute to the next. and if the nurses dont bath and dress her everyday, she wont wash... kinda weird she cant remember how to bathe, but she can remember phone numbers to call and whine about everything under the sun or when it's time to go eat at the cafeteria... I was there the other day and she was acting all out of it, then a little before 5PM she says "it's dinner time, I have to go"... I was how in the heck were you so out of it 10 minutes ago, then all of a sudden got clear at 4:50PM.. weird... I think half of it is an act for sympathy, she has always been a pity hound and emotional manipulator ever since I can remember 30 years ago... but she does have Alzheimer's, so soon she wont have enough left to know. so I'll take what have until that time comes, good and bad, fake or not..

[twilyth]

MikeB12. I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother. I can't imagine what it's like to lose your mind like and still be lucid enough at times to know that it's happening.

I hate to follow your post with something comical.

This isn't the word of the day but the one UD had kinda sucked so I found this one instead.

multislacking

multislacking

Doing multiple slacker-esque things concurrently.
I'm the king of multislacking. I spend hours a day surfing the 'net, watching random TV shows, and eating week-old pizza.

[fart_plume]

Damn that sounds too much like me.......................

[MikeB12]

MikeB12. I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother. I can't imagine what it's like to lose your mind like and still be lucid enough at times to know that it's happening.
I hate to follow your post with something comical.

meh, it doesn't matter..I laugh at her all the time.. she brought me the tv remote when she was visiting and asked how to hang it up... (she thought it was the phone and had been carrying it around trying to dial it for 20 minutes)....

she's 84yo, outlived 2 husbands, and only worked a job for about 5 years of her life... the rest has been provided for. so she's had a good life.. this is just the end... some ends are slow and some are fast.. some are painful and some not.. and hers is not painful... and to be honest, not knowing what is gong on is not a bad way to go... the family thinks it is, but from the individual's perspective, it's not... I have a little insight on the subject from 2006-2007 when my kidney's and liver failed... I had to get all my affairs in order with a 3 month life expectancy in early 07... luckily 2 months later the transplant organs came through... but still those 2 months of complete hospital illness, pain, daily medical drills like tubes, drains, procedures, morphine all the while knowing it was coming to an end wasn't fun. and I knew what was going on most of the time... with my grams, she's physically fine and has no pain, the mind just slowly fades. that's much less stressful and painful than the end I was experiencing in Feb-April 07... so she's got it good from my viewpoint... to have a long full life, always provided for, and to end in a slowly forgetting state of mind, with the body still functioning properly until the very end. that's not bad...


so let the humor go on, it wasn't a pity post... you mentioned Alzheimer's, and thought I'd share a personal story, that's all... If I can make jokes about her antics, then obviously it's not a delicate subject...

[twilyth]

MikeB12 - yeah, I guess if my choice were between a death of blissful ignorance and one that was slow and painful, it wouldn't be a hard choice.

Since you said it's not a difficult subject, here's a joke I heard a long time ago which is really in pretty bad taste, but you might like it - given some of the things you've said.

Q: What's the best thing about having Alzheimer's?
A: You get to meet new people every day.

[twilyth]

This is a really good one.

October 29: deja moo

The feeling that you have heard this bull before.

Katie: " How come you guys didn't go out and celebrate your anniversary?"
Nicole: " We were going to, but he had to take care of his little sister again."
Katie: "That sounds like deja moo to me."

[Jochenp]

Best word I ever learned there was Backwang. Instant classic.

[Hoboclese]

sickest thing i ever read about on there was the backwards apple. not going to describe it here might get in trouble!

another good one that i didn't get from urban dictionary but is probably on there is the reverse or backwards kanga.

[YugenM]

sickest thing i ever read about on there was the backwards apple. not going to describe it here might get in trouble!

Oh... GOD.

Not the first time Urban Dictionary disgusted me though

[twilyth]

Oh... GOD.

Not the first time Urban Dictionary disgusted me though

You all should sign up as editors - they'll let anybody do it - even me.

I don't even understand what they're saying. Maybe it's my brain's way of protecting me from the horrible reality.

[twilyth]

from 10/20

designated texter

a passenger who reads and replies to any and all text messages recieved on the drivers phone, thus alowing the driver to focus on the road and not hit anything or get pulled over for reckless driving.
Guy 1: "Woah, i almost hit that telephone pole back there, Dude you should be my designated texter "

Guy 2: "Yeah no problem bro"

[MikeB12]

Crop dusting
1. farting while walking; walking while farting;
2. Passing gas in a stealth manor, usually while walking through a crowd or a group, so that someone else gets blamed for the stench, or at the very least people besides the assailent must suffer it.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...m=crop+dusting

[twilyth]

This isn't from UD, but I might add it.

Ferret boobs - the kind that are long and have little whiskers on the end.

[philbrown23]

bahahhaaaa feret boobs, you gotta add that.

[twilyth]

November 10: MIRF

(merf) noun. acronym for Mom I'd Run From. The opposite of a MILF. A mom you definitely would not want to do.

"I don't know where she gets her good looks, her mom is a
MIRF!"

"Your momma's so ugly she's not a MILF she's a MIRF!"

[twilyth]

November 22: :banana::banana::banana::banana:occhio

A person who embellishes their sexcapades to sound cooler.

Guy 1: "Did Tommy tell you about his all-nighter with that hot chick from the bar last night?"
Guy 2: "Yeah right dude, he's such a :banana::banana::banana::banana:occhio. She told me nothing happened."

[Jochenp]

sargasm 2701 up, 667 down love ithate it

Deriving far too much satisfaction from glibly berating another with sarcasm.
"Oh, thanks a lot for drinking my last beer! No, it's my fault... if I wanted it for myself, I shouldn't have put it in the fridge!"
"Dude, don't have a sargasm."

Strong lulz

[twilyth]

November 27: vegetarian

A bad hunter. Someone who survives by consuming not food, but the stuff that food eats.

The vegetarian was forced to subsist on slower prey, such as the broccoli and carrot.

[inCore]

That last one is great. Reminds me of this:

[[XC] 2long4u]

Is that where the "dirty sanchez" and "rusty trombone" came from?

[twilyth]

mooseltoe

cameltoe at Christmas time. Also known as christmastoe.
Kim had mooseltoe in the pants she wore to the company christmas party.