{HOAX} Nvidia's Derek Perez Assaults Charlie Demerjian (Literally)

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06-24-2008, 02:02 PM
Face

{HOAX} Nvidia's Derek Perez Assaults Charlie Demerjian (Literally)

Edit: Just a spoof, dammit. :rofl:.

Quote:

Disclaimer: This is a joke. It did not really happen. Though Derek did invite Charlie for coffee.

Quote:

Nvidia's Derek Perez Assaults Journalist

Rumor has it there was an attempt at rapprochement. Long annoyed with The Inquirer’s loose cannon Charlie Demerjian, Nvidia has been shunning him and took him off the invitee list of most events. Water to a duck in the case of Charlie, he has so many sources the only reason he goes to any event is to score food and babes – he does better on the food as not many babes go to those things either.

So Derek Perez, Nvidia’s boss of PR and infamous for having a knife fight with a former competitor and now employee Brian Burke, thought if I can live with Burke, I can live with anyone. Perez sent out a friendly “Hey, how about coffee, or breakfast,” email.

Charlie, not one to turn down a donut, and bored to tears in Taipei, said why not, and met Perez at the hotel restaurant.

If you’ve ever met Charlie, you know he doesn’t suffer fools, is quick to make decision, and not the most tactful person on the planet. Oh, and did I mention, opinionated. The annoying thing about him is he’s often right.

The coffee part went OK, but when the serious talk got started and Perez started laying down some ground rules, Charlie said, no, no, hell, no, what the F**’s wrong with you, you deaf – no.

Body builder and short fused Perez had had just about enough and before anyone could blink, karate trained Perez had ninjaed his dish of eggs right into Charlie’s face.

Swift acting guards quickly defused the situation as Demerjian was in the process of loading his quart bottle of Coke with Mentos – the carnage was avoided but it was a tense few moments. Both men were escorted out of the restaurant, through separate doors and the police took over after that.

Charlie was next seen at the Intel event, and then at the ATI event. Perez hasn’t been seen and isn’t answering email, but then the 9800 GTX+ may have been keeping him busy.

http://jonpeddie.com/jpr/blogs/attempted_rapprochement/

WTF?? :confused: :ROTF:
06-24-2008, 02:08 PM
Chickenfeed

Are you serious? :p:

Thats got to be the funniest thing I've heard in a long time. I do have to say the Charlie can really be a :banana::banana::banana::banana::banana::banana: sometimes though.
06-24-2008, 02:09 PM
STaRGaZeR

LOL maybe this thread will also get deleted? Let's hope not, funny read to say the least :lol:
06-24-2008, 02:10 PM
bowman

Sounds like something from The Onion to me.

If Charlie is anything like in his articles in real life I don't blame this Perez fella at all.
06-24-2008, 02:12 PM
thephenom

LOL, is this serious? Or did Jon Peddie switch jobs to become a comedian.....
06-24-2008, 02:17 PM
Starscream

its a joke.

Quote:

The annoying thing about him is he’s often right.

This bit pretty much gave it away, cause Charlie cant say a single possitive thing about Nvidia and has often been wrong. Most amusing is when he writes an article one week and the next week writes an article saying the exact opposite.
06-24-2008, 02:23 PM
TurboDiv

That Perez guy "went to lay down rules"... This is funny by itself. The Inquirer might be quiet harsh on times but its not all bs. So I really don't know why that Perez guy wants anything from the Charlie guy. GTX 280 did not deliver the anticipated POWER in the end so Mr. Perez should go and karate the research and development team 1st, than this Charlie dude... :p:
06-24-2008, 02:24 PM
Charles Wirth

This thread is fine, it actually happened.
06-24-2008, 02:28 PM
Morais

Lmao
06-24-2008, 02:32 PM
swami

mentos :rofl: oh man ..:rofl:
06-24-2008, 02:33 PM
Knight

Quote:

Originally Posted by FUGGER

This thread is fine, it actually happened.

The guy has a huge stake in Nvidia. Why would he jeopardize his job by getting into a fight? :(
06-24-2008, 02:34 PM
eleeter

:rotf::rotf:
06-24-2008, 02:35 PM
Frank M

Quote:

Body builder and short fused Perez had had just about enough and before anyone could blink, karate trained Perez had ninjaed his dish of eggs right into Charlie’s face.

Swift acting guards quickly defused the situation as Demerjian was in the process of loading his quart bottle of Coke with Mentos

Coke-mentos cannon ftw? :ROTF:
06-24-2008, 02:44 PM
nn_step

how childish.
06-24-2008, 02:45 PM
Eson

Oh man, haha. Nvidia sure is a crazy company.
06-24-2008, 02:46 PM
ownage

Quote:

Originally Posted by nn_step

how childish.

Yes but still funny as hell :shocked::ROTF:
06-24-2008, 02:49 PM
Tim

Mr. Demerjian had it coming for a long long time. :ROTF:
06-24-2008, 02:52 PM
knightwolf654

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frank M

Coke-mentos cannon ftw? :ROTF:

if thats the first thing he does in his defense something tells me thats not the first time lol :rofl::ROTF:
06-24-2008, 02:53 PM
thenrz

Quote:

Originally Posted by FUGGER

This thread is fine, it actually happened.

I was waiting for someone to say this!

That's hilarious...yet puts such a bad business face on nVidia if other sources catch hold.
06-24-2008, 02:56 PM
twwen2

:rofl::ROTF:

Cop that. Fricken hilarious:clap:
06-24-2008, 02:59 PM
Papu

lol needs a video :D
06-24-2008, 03:02 PM
Charles Wirth

Quote:

Originally Posted by thenrz

I was waiting for someone to say this!

That's hilarious...yet puts such a bad business face on nVidia if other sources catch hold.

Nah, I am sure Charlie was pushing buttons to get a reaction.

Journalists should be more professional, something Charlie is not. He would show up at an event all unkempt in a 1970's different strokes t-shirt with holes and try to pass out candy or show off NDA roadmaps to anyone who will listen.

He has a bone to pick with Nvidia and should be considered hostile.
06-24-2008, 03:07 PM
STaRGaZeR

Anyone here waiting for his reaction? :D
06-24-2008, 03:17 PM
ownage

Quote:

Originally Posted by STaRGaZeR

Anyone here waiting for his reaction? :D

Already asked him. ;) Should be fun!
06-24-2008, 03:19 PM
bowman

Charlie strikes me more as a sensationalist clown than a journalist.
06-24-2008, 03:21 PM
Hu1kamania

With Charlies big mouth, I don't think Perez could have missed.
06-24-2008, 03:27 PM
IvanAndreevich

1 Attachment(s)

This guy is a body builder, karate kid?
:up:
06-24-2008, 03:32 PM
highoctane

Isn't it kinda ironic it was eggs that he had ordered and then karate chop hip toss said eggs at the other fellow, kinda like here's egg on your face metaphor.

Isn't the Inq more like the paparazzi of computers than journalism?
06-24-2008, 03:32 PM
informal

Is this the new marketing tactics NVidia will use to get the attention from the new Radeons? :D :rofl:

Jen-Hsun Huang: "Starting from tomorrow,new, all in tactics are effective.You have a clearance to do what you have to do to ensure our market presence!"
Derek Perez:"Karate/ninja action plan is effective too? Can i be the first to employ such?Even tonight?:
Jen-Hsun Huang:"That's an affirmative Derek!Apply the karate/ninja strategy tonight,lure the victim in the hotel restaurant,use rapprochement as a bait.Target is confirmed:Charlie Demerjian!"
Derek Perez:"Roger that ,sir!Charlie it is!Let he be prepared for dish of eggs landing right in his face!"

NVidia board of directors(laughing in evil way):"Buhahahahahaha!"

Sorry ,couldn't resist! :p:
06-24-2008, 03:38 PM
Hornet331

Quote:

Originally Posted by bowman

Charlie strikes me more as a sensationalist clown than a journalist.

haha thought the same. :ROTF:
06-24-2008, 04:03 PM
Dragy2k

Quote:

Originally Posted by FUGGER

Nah, I am sure Charlie was pushing buttons to get a reaction.

Journalists should be more professional, something Charlie is not. He would show up at an event all unkempt in a 1970's different strokes t-shirt with holes and try to pass out candy or show off NDA roadmaps to anyone who will listen.

He has a bone to pick with Nvidia and should be considered hostile.

hehe but surely you had a wry smile on your face when u read that
;)
06-24-2008, 04:26 PM
awdrifter

Very childish on both sides.
06-24-2008, 04:39 PM
bill_d

Quote:

Originally Posted by awdrifter

Very childish on both sides.

yes
and round two will be with lawyers
06-24-2008, 05:08 PM
Kingcarcas

Haha!! He had it coming, maybe a karate chop is just what the guy needs :rofl:
06-24-2008, 05:18 PM
Zytek_Fan

Quote:

Originally Posted by FUGGER

Nah, I am sure Charlie was pushing buttons to get a reaction.

Journalists should be more professional, something Charlie is not. He would show up at an event all unkempt in a 1970's different strokes t-shirt with holes and try to pass out candy or show off NDA roadmaps to anyone who will listen.

He has a bone to pick with Nvidia and should be considered hostile.

He also occassionally shows up to Intel events in a rabbit suit :down:

Charlie definitely deserves to get his arse kicked.
06-24-2008, 05:26 PM
Seraphiel

Jen-Hsun Huang: "Execute Order (Omega) 66"
NVIDIA Grunt: "I do not believe you can give this order, sir"
Jen-Hsun Huang: "This is from Emperor Otellini itself"
NVIDIA Grunt: "Sir, yes sir. Executing Order 66"

;)
06-24-2008, 06:22 PM
purecain

you have a dissagreement face to face... get stuck in and sort it out like men.... like they did in the old days.....
06-24-2008, 06:25 PM
GAR

LOL, Charlie is armenian, so am i, he probably said something, we get pretty hard headed some times.
06-24-2008, 06:26 PM
Seraphiel

Quote:

Originally Posted by purecain

you have a dissagreement face to face... get stuck in and sort it out like men.... like they did in the old days.....

Charlie couldn't stand a chance in any real man to man confrontation, like so many others... :ROTF:

EDIT: Most nerds hides behind a veil of "knowing" and "insight", but when facing a real physical confrontation, they are wise to either act like they are more than this (when they feel comfortable that someone will "rescue them from" or "diffuse" the confrontation.

Many people in this world, would see things differently in another perspective, once they have been put into a hospital for injuries caused by their loud mouth and "beliefs". Too little responsibility for words and actions are passed around...
06-24-2008, 06:42 PM
JumpingJack

Charlie has it in for nVidia ;)

Oddly, Peddie claims Charlie is often right... that is worth a bit of a chuckle to.
06-24-2008, 06:47 PM
Seraphiel

Quote:

Originally Posted by JumpingJack

Charlie has it in for nVidia ;)

Oddly, Peddie claims Charlie is often right... that is worth a bit of a chuckle to.

Yeah, that has long been established. The number of articles where he got it all wrong, or FUD'ed the facts is too long to name. He should be held responsible, and if I was NVIDIA I would probably try to sue him for exactly that. I may not win, but I am sure financially he would loose big time.
06-24-2008, 07:00 PM
DRCRAWFISH

So his first defense is to load a coke bottle with mentos :rofl:
06-24-2008, 07:12 PM
eleeter

Quote:

Originally Posted by DRCRAWFISH

So his first defense is to load a coke bottle with mentos :rofl:

:ROTF::ROTF:

That is some seriously funny shi:rehab:
06-24-2008, 07:15 PM
MaxxxRacer

Quote:

Originally Posted by DRCRAWFISH

So his first defense is to load a coke bottle with mentos :rofl:

Those things are lethal weapons when they explode. No joke.
06-24-2008, 07:19 PM
twwen2

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaxxxRacer

Those things are lethal weapons when they explode. No joke.

Yeah look it up on YouTube! Funny stuff...:yepp:
06-24-2008, 07:27 PM
Fuji

that's pretty funny.

I remember reading on the INQ there was an Intel gathering and someone asked Intel a question and charlie was like "let me answer that" and went along to answer the question. Mike and pat gelsinger were like that's going on?

Charlie is a nice guy. I've emailed him from time to time and he's friggen smart.
06-24-2008, 07:42 PM
cygnus_x_1

this story just made my night. i wish perez would have gotten a hold of him...:rofl:
06-24-2008, 07:49 PM
dinos22

maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan
wish we could see a video

seriously what was Perez thinking there lol

Charlie used to be a good writer. He's really whoring those articles now. I don't think he would take himself seriously :ROTF::D
[edit] gay he added a disclaimer now.....oh well sounded too good to be true i guess lol
06-24-2008, 07:51 PM
HotGore

Wow computers....serious buisness. First Broadcom now nVidia.
06-24-2008, 08:15 PM
T_M

Quote:

Originally Posted by HotGore

Wow computers....serious buisness. First Broadcom now nVidia.

http://meeplemorph.files.wordpress.c...7718140pu4.gif
06-24-2008, 09:00 PM
Dainas

Quote:

Originally Posted by GAR

LOL, Charlie is armenian, so am i, he probably said something, we get pretty hard headed some times.

Haha, Charlie more like an embarrassment to Armenians... as if there were already not enough loud mouthed Internet thoughguys with an axe to grind and SOAD in their sig.
06-24-2008, 09:20 PM
zsamz_

Quote:

Originally Posted by GAR

LOL, Charlie is armenian, so am i, he probably said something, we get pretty hard headed some times.

lol i'm armenian too we mostly hard headed
06-24-2008, 09:22 PM
zsamz_

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dainas

Haha, Charlie more like an embarrassment to Armenians... as if there were already not enough loud mouthed Internet thoughguys with an axe to grind and SOAD in their sig.

no embarassment here
better to be real than hide behind a screen:clap:
06-25-2008, 03:22 AM
roadie

Did no one read this at the bottom of the article?

Quote:

Disclaimer: This is a joke. It did not really happen. Though Derek did invite Charlie for coffee.
06-25-2008, 03:29 AM
Syn.

Quote:

Originally Posted by roadie

Did no one read this at the bottom of the article?

...

Quote:

Originally Posted by FUGGER

This thread is fine, it actually happened.
06-25-2008, 03:30 AM
Sampsa

Quote:

Originally Posted by roadie

Did no one read this at the bottom of the article?

Disclaimer wasn't there in the original blog post.
06-25-2008, 04:24 AM
saveus222

Lol.. i think he's just too busy with articles like the one below to write any decent stuff now... :rofl:

http://www.theinquirer.net/gb/inquir...-breast-things
06-25-2008, 04:32 AM
MomijiTMO

Oh man, I think Fugger's confirmation made me laugh more.
06-25-2008, 04:53 AM
JohnJohn

http://images.vnu.net/gb/inquirer/ne...s/bunnytwo.jpg

I want to see round 2..... from vegas... with Jen-Hsun Huang as don King
06-25-2008, 06:05 AM
Face

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sampsa

Disclaimer wasn't there in the original blog post.

Yeah.

Dang, too funny to be true I guess :rofl: .
06-25-2008, 06:21 AM
thenrz

Quote:

Originally Posted by FUGGER

Nah, I am sure Charlie was pushing buttons to get a reaction.

Journalists should be more professional, something Charlie is not. He would show up at an event all unkempt in a 1970's different strokes t-shirt with holes and try to pass out candy or show off NDA roadmaps to anyone who will listen.

He has a bone to pick with Nvidia and should be considered hostile.

Isn't it his job to play the devil's advocate? Companies need to be kept on their toes by the media (Ok, I get it, it's in INQ, but you see what I'm saying) to filter out the BS as get the facts. If he gets attacked, literally, by someone in upper management at nVidia, apparently he pushed the wrong buttons, but that's his job. If nVidia has something against theINQ, they need to release a better part and not attack anyone over a nice plate of delicious breakfast.
06-25-2008, 06:27 AM
flopper

dosnt matter, if your from Nvidia you also must act professional regardless of the rules ;)
go charlie go.

I guess charlie isnt the only one wanting to pick a bone with Nvidia, Intel is one and I guess the rest must stand in line :D
06-25-2008, 06:32 AM
VIctorj

Reality check: Nerd body builders...ill be off to give him a run for his money...a55hole. (me body builder nerd).
06-25-2008, 07:22 AM
iddqd

Quote:

Originally Posted by bowman

more as a sensationalist clown than a journalist.

There's a difference? :shrug:
06-25-2008, 07:27 AM
Eldonko

I knew it was bs from the mentos cannon thing but funny nonetheless. Perez ninjaed his dish of eggs right into Charlie’s face. haha
06-25-2008, 07:51 AM
Katanai

This is one of the funniest thing I've read on a tech site. You gotta understand the man though. I've read just one article from that dude and he was saying Nvidia is Satan, can't find a link to post right now but the article exists, haven't bothered reading anything else since then. If he said things like that in front of an Nvidia employee he is lucky to have escaped with only this...
06-25-2008, 11:14 AM
Omastar

Quote:

Originally Posted by FUGGER

Nah, I am sure Charlie was pushing buttons to get a reaction.

Journalists should be more professional, something Charlie is not. He would show up at an event all unkempt in a 1970's different strokes t-shirt with holes and try to pass out candy or show off NDA roadmaps to anyone who will listen.

He has a bone to pick with Nvidia and should be considered hostile.

:ROTF::rofl: Best thing I have read all day.
06-25-2008, 02:46 PM
gOJDO

Charlie is a jackass. He has been wrong so many times and when that is pointed out to him he becomes arrogant and ignorant. It would my pleasure to punch him in his face.
06-25-2008, 02:50 PM
ownage

Quote:

Originally Posted by roadie

Did no one read this at the bottom of the article?

Yes and I mailed Charlie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Charlie

Yeah, it is really simple. :) I had breakfast with Perez in the Taipei Hyatt, and I told Peddie about it. He said "Breakfast? You mean he threw eggs in your face?" It kind of grew from there.

Still damn funny article! :rofl:
06-25-2008, 11:08 PM
JohnZS

Quote:

Originally Posted by JohnJohn

http://images.vnu.net/gb/inquirer/ne...s/bunnytwo.jpg

I want to see round 2..... from vegas... with Jen-Hsun Huang as don King

:rofl::rofl:
06-26-2008, 12:41 AM
saaya

lol, what an idi0t... assulting a member of the press... :lol:

Quote:

If you’ve ever met Charlie, you know he doesn’t suffer fools, is quick to make decision, and not the most tactful person on the planet. Oh, and did I mention, opinionated.

i dont agree, charlie can be very tactful, but hes honest and doesnt play nice when he doesnt like somebody. and opinionated, yes, like everybody, again hes straightforward about it and doesnt pretend to be unbiased like most people. everybody is biased, and the ones trying hardest to appear unbiased are the worst.

Quote:

The annoying thing about him is he’s often right.

hahahah thats only annoying when you try to prove him wrong :D
06-26-2008, 12:44 AM
Sr7

Quote:

Originally Posted by saaya

lol, what an idi0t... assulting a member of the press... :lol:

i dont agree, charlie can be very tactful, but hes honest and doesnt play nice when he doesnt like somebody. and opinionated, yes, like everybody, again hes straightforward about it and doesnt pretend to be unbiased like most people. everybody is biased, and the ones trying hardest to appear unbiased are the worst.

hahahah thats only annoying when you try to prove him wrong :D

What an idi0t... not reading that it didn't really happen at the bottom of the article and also posted in this thread...:clap:

Not to mention the fact that calling Charlie "a member of the press" is an insult to people who study real journalism.
06-26-2008, 03:33 AM
Kingcarcas

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sr7

What an idi0t... not reading that it didn't really happen at the bottom of the article and also posted in this thread...:clap:

*Hands flame shield*...........
06-26-2008, 12:25 PM
Face

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sr7

What an idi0t... not reading that it didn't really happen at the bottom of the article and also posted in this thread...:clap:

Not to mention the fact that calling Charlie "a member of the press" is an insult to people who study real journalism.

Hey man, that's a little harsh. The Disclaimer was not in the original article. it only appeard later, and I wasn't home all day to notify about it in the first post. It's edited now, but we did think it was legit before that.. He just missed it, that's all. No reason to fight over anything, it was all in a good spirit and was a pretty funny story nonetheless. Thanks for reading. :up: